Dear Angel,
I am not going to disclose my name, but I have been in a relationship for more than a year now. I find out often that my lover has been talking to other men behind my back on the Internet, even discussing moving in with these guys. I am not sure what to do, he says he loves me.
Confused and hurt
Answer from Angel:
First, I want to say I'm sorry you're having to go through this. Emotional pain is the worst kind, in my opinion. Does your boyfriend know that you know his secrets? Have you talked to him about it? Communication is very important in making a relationship work. If you don't have good communication, there may be issues he is having that you're not aware of. So first thing I recommend doing is just talking through this with him in a non-hostile way. Be as civil as you can be and ask him why he is doing this. Ask him if he really wants to move in with someone else and if he thinks you honestly have a future together. Honesty is also important. Sometimes people just say stuff online and really aren't serious about it, and this may be the case. I know people who are very big flirts online, to the point of even being a tease, but in reality, have no intentions of doing anything. But these are things that you two need to discuss. Just remember good communication and honesty. I wish you two the best of luck and hope you can work this out.
Peace,
Angel Lopez
yourhispaniclover@yahoo.com
**The Beliefs and advice in this column are meant for entertainment purposes only and are not necessarily the views of West Virginia's Queer News. Please seek professional assistance for any serious problem that is impacting your life.